‘They wanted to drown me at birth – now I’m a poet’

Excerpts from BBC News Stories – published on Aug 30 2020. The full article can be read – https://www.bbc.com/news/stories-53749629

Credits to Rahil Sheikh BBC News All pictures copyright Kuli Kohli

Born in an Indian village with cerebral palsy, Kuli Kohli was lucky to survive. Neighbours told her parents they should throw her in the river, instead they brought her to the UK. As she grew up here, writing became her means of escape – and transformed her life in ways she never expected.

Waiting to be called on stage in her home town of Wolverhampton, Kuli Kohli felt sick with anxiety. She was petrified her words wouldn’t come out and worried she would fall flat on her face. Her heart soared and her nerves clattered. Self-doubt raced through her mind. “Why am I putting myself through all of this?” she asked herself.

The host welcomed Kuli to the empty chair that was waiting for her. It was dark, a spotlight illuminated the stage, and a small wave of applause rippled around the room.

Emerging from the side of the stage, Kuli nervously approached the mic. She took a breath and a few seconds of silence passed before she shared one of her poems with an audience for the very first time.

Mine

I have a dream; please don’t influence it,

It belongs to me.

I have a delicate heart; please don’t break it,

It belongs to me.

I have peace of mind; please don’t disturb it,

It belongs to me.

I have to follow a path; please don’t obstruct it,

It belongs to me.

I have an amazing life; please let me live it,

It belongs to me.

I have a choice; please don’t choose for me,

It belongs to me.

I have freedom; please don’t capture me,

It belongs to me.

I have incredible feelings; please don’t hurt me,

They belong to me.

I have a lot of love; please don’t hate me,

Love is mine to share.

I’m on my material journey; don’t follow me

It won’t be fair.

So… I have a dream; it’s my dream to be free.

Kuli had more reason than most to experience stage fright. She was born with cerebral palsy, a neurological condition that affects her speech, her movement, posture, coordination and balance.

Getting up on stage and pouring out her poetry was her victory against those who told her that her life wasn’t worth living because of her disability – that she would never amount to anything or achieve her goals. She was embracing and owning a part of her identity, something she had been made to feel ashamed of all her life.

In 1970, when Kuli was born in a remote village in Uttar Pradesh, northern India, it soon became apparent that she was unlike the other children.

Kuli’s mother was about 15 years old when she gave birth to her. She was the first-born and many within the community were disappointed that she was not a boy – first-born daughters were often looked upon negatively. But her gender wasn’t the only thing the villagers noticed.

“People thought I was a strange girl, because I was different. Pretty much as soon as I was born, people would tell my mother to get rid of me because nobody would marry a girl like this,” she says.

“No-one knew what the matter with me was. Disabilities were not understood in my village at the time, and nobody knew what cerebral palsy was. People in the village would tell my family that I was a punishment from a previous life,” she says.

“I was too young to remember but my auntie who lived with us told me that my body was like a rag doll.”

A few villagers argued that she should be thrown into the river and left to drown.

“But I was literally saved by my father. He physically had to intervene to stop my body from being taken from our home and discarded like an object,” says Kuli. “He saved my life and stood up for me.”

It wasn’t long before her family decided her future didn’t lie in this village.

Please read the full article https://www.bbc.com/news/stories-53749629

At 49, Kuli has come a long way.

“My conclusion is that disability is the problem of the whole of society,” she says. “Our community doesn’t encourage disabled people enough – their personal issues and problems are not taken seriously and are kept hidden. We all have disabilities to an extent. Ignorance of disability is in our roots and this will take many generations to grow out.”

Kuli has summed up her life in her poem, Survivor.

Entered the world like an uninvited guest;

I hid away, embarrassed- I was a disgrace.

Flawed, I survived this sentence. A tough test.

A child who was compared with all the rest,

I was different- an alien from outer space;

entered the world like an uninvited guest.

Benefits, wages kept me together, dressed,

I was a cash point- abused without a case;

flawed, I survived this sentence- a tough test.

On display to men for marriage; suppressed,

I was a British visa for Asian men to chase;

entered the world like an uninvited guest.

A lucky escape, rescued by a husband; blessed

with a family that I could love and embrace.

Flawed, I survived this sentence, a tough test.

My dreams came true and all were impressed,

a valued writer, poet, working mum, a place.

Entered the world like an uninvited guest,

flawed, I survive this sentence – a tough test.

All pictures copyright Kuli Kohli

Credits to the original article – https://www.bbc.com/news/stories-53749629












Please have a look at some of the videos

Poem “The Rag Doll” written for people living with CP. 

The Rag Doll by Kuli Kohli

Poem called “Payal” filmed at the British Museum in London for International Day of Persons with Disabilities 2019.

Ankle Bells @ British Museum #PurpleLightUp 3/12/19

Please follow 

Kuli Kohli – Website

Kuli Kohli – on facebook

Kuli Kohli – on YouTube

Kuli Kohli – on Twitter

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